_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘     now,   stuck  ain’t the same as a cold case.    i been stuck.    waitin’ on warrants,   lab results    —    waitin’ for the DA t’ pull his head out of his ass    —    blah,   blah.    that’s the shit they  don’t  tell you about,   y’ know,   all that  waitin’.    that,   uh,   that larsen case,   a couple years back ?    girl we found in discovery park ?    that  was a whole lot’a waitin’.    but we got ‘em,   so.    job well done.    you know how we do.     ’}

_{the sentiment catches him off guard,   thumb swiping his lower lip ;   gives him pause in the process of pulling dishes from a cabinet.    one of the good ones.    not something he’s heard in excess,   but the impact is a little more significant when it comes from bullet.}

_{‘     –––––––    linden ain’t bad.    think she had it  out  for me when we first got paired up.     ’}

_{it’s a punchline,   the best he can manage,   like none of that was a big deal.    the expression contained within a split - second’s glance tells a different story.}

_{he clears his throat,   turns his back again to pull the sunny d from the refrigerator and pour some of it out into a glass.}

_{‘     this stuff’s like ninety - five percent  sugar.    damn teeth’re gonna rot out’cha head.     ’}

_{❛     nah,  i mean    –––––    stuck like,  you’re out there strugglin’ to put  two ‘n two together,  meanwhile the killer’s jus’ kickin’ back,  havin’ a smoke ‘n a beer,  enjoyin’ his freedom.    that kinda stuck.    …  ain’t that the same case where mayor richmond got  shot  or somethin’ ?     ❜}

_{how could she forget ?    thirteen,  fresh meat on the streets of seattle.    it was the first time her parents  begged and pleaded  for their child to come home,  worried she might end up like the larsen girl.    two weeks away from her fourteenth birthday.     she remembers the rumours that spread like  goddamn wildfire  and talk of detectives picking up some  junkie,  questioning him at the skate park.}

_{❛     holy crap.    that  was  you ‘n linden !    those pigs who grilled that meth - head !    small world,  ain’t it ?     ❜}

_{she likes linden.    reminds her of kallie in some ways.    the freckled fair skin and red hair,  mostly.    can’t imagine that woman  ever  taking a liking to someone like  holder  under any other circumstance    (    it’s the juxtaposition of their partnership.    opposites attract.    it works for them.     )}

_{❛     see,  i like ‘em a li’l  feisty  sometimes.    y’ know them redheads got a mean temper,  right ?    ❜     shoulders then hitch in a shrug.     ❛    1 - 800 - did i ask for your damn opinion ?    i’d be drinkin’ those nasty ass  v8  juices and chowin’ down  gluten - free  if it was up t’ you.     ❜}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘     yup.    venom’s in their dorsal ‘n pectoral spines.    see,   most of the time you get stung in the  hand  but some fool on catfishin’ kings caught one in the  thigh.    yo,   piranhas are old as  shit    —    like,   they got fossils from 25 million years ago.     ’}

_{❛     yeah !    it actually  breaks down  red blood cells ‘n  poisons  the nervous system.    it ain’t the venom that can kill you,  either    ––––    it’s all that bacteria from the li’l pieces of  spine  ‘n other tissues that can break off ‘n cause mad infections,  yo.    piranhas are so badass !    they can bite through  a human hand  in,  like,  five seconds !    ❜}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘     sounds like you didn’t give her much  choice,   li’l man.     ’       he lets out a short laugh,   involuntary and sincere.       ‘     more than me  my  ASS.    hey,   just ‘cause you got a thing for rabbits and their  stomach muscles  don’t mean i can’t still swipe the floor with your ass.    y’ know catfish are carnivores,   ‘n they got taste buds all over their bodies ?     ’}

_{❛     nobody  deserves  t’ be  shanked  when they’re in diapers,  yo !    get outta here.     ❜     at least he keeps things interesting.     ❛     –––––     yeah.    some of ‘em are poisonous too.    got these glands in their skin that secrete these nasty toxins when they’re stressed ‘n shit.    did you know piranhas are actually omnivores ?    ❜}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘     hell  no.    i’m a  1 - 900 - rockstar.     ’}

_{truthfully,   he hasn’t been at the grindstone long enough to leave room for  COLD CASES.    but there’s the ones you can’t crack,   and the ones you can’t close    —    he’d take the former any day,   because few things grate more than watching a perp  walk  on some technicality.    red tape.    insufficient evidence.    whatever.    that always reads like sloppy police work,   and it rankles him in more ways than he can name.}

_{goldie had walked,   initially.    cut loose   real  quick on skinner’s order,   under the pretense of  leading them to more bodies.    like so much bullshit.}

_{fuck skinner.    he deserved what he got.}

_{holder’s only regret is that it played out the way it did.}

_{hands thrown up in surrender,   he circles around the counter island and grabs that stupid apron with a theatrical sweep of his arm.       ‘     alright,   playa,   just this once i’ma let you call the shots.    can i start’cha off with somethin’ to drink on this  fine  morning ?     ’}

_{❛    aw,  c’mon !    that’s bullshit ‘n you know it.    there’s gotta be  somethin’.    ain’t’cha ever been stuck ?     ❜}

_{like solving a two - thousand piece puzzle from beginning to end with no interim.    it must take a special kind of person to invest all that time and energy into solving  murders,  just so the public can spit in their faces and tell them they’re not doing their job fast enough.    bullet was no exception.    she reflects on that with only the bare minimum of understanding a fifteen year old  street rat  can have.}

_{sometimes,  when she’s been looking in the mirror too long and mapping out her scars,  she still resents him for dodging those calls.    wishes she’d never met him.    that the  pied piper  finished the job he started.    that she choked on the blood in her mouth.    that it got into her lungs.    and  these  are the times where she disappears.}

_{but there  are  others    ––––    times where she looks at him and sees  man  instead of  machine.   he’s a person with the same capacity for  human emotion  as anyone else.}

_{❛    …  you’re one of the good ones.    y’ know ?    you’re a good cop.    you ‘n linden are probably the best thing that’s happened t’ seattle.     ❜}

_{she snuffs out the cigarette   (    before it burns down to the filter,    )    then moves the ashtray back to its place atop of the coffee table.    doesn’t comment on the apron,  because the quirk of a brow says enough.    original grilla  is kind of false advertising for someone who doesn’t own a grill.}

_{❛     man,  i’m  always  callin’ the shots !    you got any more of that sunny d left ?     ❜     the same  sunny d  she toddles into the kitchen for at  ass o’clock in the morning  to drink straight from the damn bottle ?    damn right.}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{JUNKYARDTEEN.}

_{❛     hundred ‘n three,  asswipe.    ❜     the doctors weighed her in at  ninety - four  the day of discharge,  just a couple of weeks before    (    in other words,  she’s reaching,  and he probably knows that.    )}

_{as most of her opponents can begrudgingly attest,  bullet is stronger than she looks,  and puts up one hell of a fight.    a one hit knockout just isn’t her style.    enjoys the adrenaline rush more than she should.    never had to remind herself that  it doesn’t hurt if you’re not afraid  until goldie got ahold of her.    until the pied piper finished what he started,  tying up those loose ends.    she felt  fear  then.   real,  visceral fear when she knew it was the end of the line.}

_{she half - expected not to be found.    holder didn’t give a shit about her.    no one did.    is that how kallie felt ?}

_{after ducking into the passenger seat,  she pauses to serve one of her  looks  before sparking her cigarette,  a lighter she’d pickpocketed from another detective still in hand when she volleys back.}

_{❛     –––––     hell no.    you first.    set a good example.     ❜}

_{a hundred and three isn’t much better.    skinner had to have been    —    what,   five - eleven ?    six feet ?    two hundred pounds easy,   give or take.    bullet hadn’t stood a chance.    none  of those girls had.    he thinks about ashley,   fourteen,   didn’t put up a fight.    and kallie :   kallie looked like a sweet kid.    doe - eyed.    those little star earrings.    fifteen years old,   like bullet.}    

_{except for that one fundamental,   inescapable difference between them :   bullet  survived.}

_{she wasn’t supposed to,   that much was clear.   she’d lost a lot of blood,   flatlined three times between the storage unit and the hospital.    it was the coroner who’d first realized she was still alive    —    i’ve got a pulse,   he’d said with alarm.    four words that changed everything.}

_{holder doesn’t remember much after that.}

_{the memory of their argument at the station isn’t as sharp as it was,   but it aches like an old bruise.    scar tissue.    it still keeps him awake,   sometimes.    knowing she went into that trunk thinking he didn’t care.}

_{he does.    fuck,   he does.}

_{‘     my ride,   my rules.    last bus comes at eleven.     ’}

_{cigarette between his lips,   he turns the key in the ignition and cuts a sidelong glance at her.   reaches to grasp his seatbelt,   making a big,   dramatic show of clicking it into place.    set a good example.    it almost sounds strange ‘til he remembers that she’s his responsibility now    —    she was signed over into his custody,   pending her recovery.    but it’s not just a legal obligation.    not just  guilt,   either.    it’s more than that.}

_{‘     example is  set.    now it’s your turn.    vámonos,   we don’t got all night.     ’}

_{only,   they kind of do.    they’ve got time.}

_{that’s the thing about second chances.}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘    yo,   ain’t those the ones you gotta  wash out  every time    —    ?    damn,   girl,   your moms put up with some  shit.     ’       pun intended.       ‘     yeah,   they teach you that in  zoology class  too ?     ’}

_{a half - laugh,  half - scoff.     ❛     yup.    bitch even  stuck me with a pin  ‘cause i wouldn’t stop  kickin’  when she was changin’ me.    pretty sure she did it on purpose.    ‘n don’t hate on zoology !    it’s the  shiznit,  yo.    betcha jelly ‘cause i know more than you.    it’s cool.    you ain’t gotta pretend.    i won’t tell nobody     –––––     ❜}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{their  audience  is barely acknowledged.    the most he does,   as they fight their way down the hall,   is serve a couple of hard looks    —    like he’s daring someone to make a move,   to step in.    but they know better.    they know  bullet,   and they don’t say a damn word.}

_{neither does holder.    not when they board the elevators down,   not when they arrive at the holding cells.    not even during processing when a  knife  is confiscated.    he takes that,   too :   she can have it back tomorrow.}

_{it’s all he can do not to grit his teeth as the cell door clangs shut with her on the inside.}

_{an officer starts to speak.    he cuts him off.       ‘     don’t talk to her.    don’t even  look  at her.    i’ll process her out in the morning,   we clear ?     ’}

_{he waits for a nod and then turns to walk out,   heedless of her protests.    it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth.}

_{‘     g’night,   bullet.     ’}

_{this isn’t the  first time  she’s been in a cell.    has to remind herself of that when he forces her in,  feet scuffing the floors and weight thrown back for the  umpteenth time  in one last attempt to resist.    one swift turn and her palms strike the bars.    once,  twice,  three times.    she calls out to him and it sounds more like a half - plea     –––––     a pathetic exploitation of vulnerability.}

_{fingers curl around those bars,  shifting a step closer to the cell door.    she stares him down and tries to ignore the beat of her own heart,  the blood rushing in her ears.    thinks it might just be a  sick game  he’s playing out of spite until the realisation sinks in.    he isn’t dicking around.}

_{and that just makes the balloon of anger inside of her chest swell again.    it climbs into her throat like bile,  spilling out into words when she curses and flips him the bird from in between the bars.}

_{❛     go t’ hell !    ‘n say hi t’ ya momma for me when you get there,  you fuckin’ pussy ass bitch !    ❜}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘     yeah,   ‘n you ain’t foolin’  nobody  with all them layers.    you’re like  ninety - five pounds  soaking wet    —    my  lunch  weighed more than you.      ’}

_{delivered as a quip,   but the connotations aren’t as lighthearted.    she’s small enough to be overpowered by someone bigger than her.    stronger than her.    someone like goldie.    someone like the  pied piper,   who shattered the bones in her wrist and beat her senseless before leaving her to  bleed out  in the trunk of a car.}

_{he remembers the expression on linden’s face when she told him not to open it.    you don’t need to be here.    please,   holder.    remembers that moment of soul - crushing realization before he’d lifted the lid.}

_{cellophane crinkles as he draws out his cigarettes,   pulling the driver’s door shut.    lights one,   passes bullet another.}

_{‘     buckle up,   li’l man.    this ain’t a limo service.     ’}

_{❛     hundred ‘n three,  asswipe.    ❜     the doctors weighed her in at  ninety - four  the day of discharge,  just a couple of weeks before    (    in other words,  she’s reaching,  and he probably knows that.    )}

_{as most of her opponents can begrudgingly attest,  bullet is stronger than she looks,  and puts up one hell of a fight.    a one hit knockout just isn’t her style.    enjoys the adrenaline rush more than she should.    never had to remind herself that  it doesn’t hurt if you’re not afraid  until goldie got ahold of her.    until the pied piper finished what he started,  tying up those loose ends.    she felt  fear  then.   real,  visceral fear when she knew it was the end of the line.}

_{she half - expected not to be found.    holder didn’t give a shit about her.    no one did.    is that how kallie felt ?}

_{after ducking into the passenger seat,  she pauses to serve one of her  looks  before sparking her cigarette,  a lighter she’d pickpocketed from another detective still in hand when she volleys back.}

_{❛     –––––     hell no.    you first.    set a good example.     ❜}

_{ORIGINALGRILLA.}

_{‘     what d’you know ‘bout  real game ?    see,   ‘cause  me    —    i was wooin’ the honeys while you were still in  pampers.    had ‘em lined up ‘round the  block  for this slice of heaven.     ’}

_{❛     joke’s on you,  ‘cause i wasn’t wearin’ pampers.    mom had me wearin’ these stupid  cloth diapers.    …  ain’t you ever heard the sayin’  ‘ you can catch flies with honey but you catch more honeys bein’ fly ’ ?     ❜}